FAQ's for Divorce MediationThis section covers the following questions:
What is divorce mediation?Typically, mediation is described as a process of "assisted negotiation" in which a neutral person assists the participants in reaching mutually agreeable decisions. These decisions can involve every aspect of a divorce or only particular issues. Because each couple has their own unique needs, the assistance provided by the mediator to one couple may be very different from the assistance provided to another. The role of the mediator can range from minimum to maximum involvement. For some couples, the mediator's role may be to provide a checklist of issues for the participants to then discuss by themselves outside the mediation session. For others, the mediator may serve as a conduit for all communication between the parties. Most often, the mediator provides a forum for the participants to discuss the issues together in an environment of safety and facilitates the participants' discussion. How is "mediation" different from "arbitration"?An arbitrator acts as a judge and tells the participants what to do, either as a binding or non-binding decision. A mediator helps the participants to devise a solution that both parties can agree to. How do I prepare for mediation?The first step in any effective negotiation is preparation. The preparation for mediation is the same as preparation for any other form of negotiation. Preparation lies primarily in gathering information in several areas. First, think about what you want to accomplish. Initially, don't worry about how the goals will be accomplished. In other words, try to avoid taking a specific position about what the details of the outcome will be. For example, a parenting goal may be to be an active part of the children's lives. An occupational goal may be to preserve the family business. It may be important to have the fact of premarital assets recognized. For each goal, ask yourself, "Why is this important to me? What do I want to accomplish by this?" These questions will help to identify your real interests. Second, think about what it is that you need to decide. Often in a divorce, parties don't know what the issues are. The mediator can help you identify these issues. If you know what the issues are, the next step is to gather all the relevant information. This information may include an inventory of assets, the value of assets, the balance of bank, stock, or retirement accounts, and the amount of debt. It may include documentation of incomes and employment benefits. This information may be gathered before the mediation session or as part of the mediation process. It is very common for participants to work with the mediator to determine what information will be relevant to their particular situation. Finally, it is important to brainstorm and think about options for resolution. Even seemingly "crazy" options can help spouses think creatively to restructure their family in a way that will meet their unique needs. This step appears later in the decision making process and, like information gathering, is often part of the mediation process but is often not something that is necessary prior to starting the mediation. What do I bring to the mediation session?It is helpful to bring anything that will help to objectively resolve factual issues. If discussing parent time-sharing issues, it is often beneficial to bring a copy of the children's school calendar and the parents' employment schedules. If discussing the assets, it is often useful to bring statements of accounts, appraisals, payment coupon books, etc. If the discussion involves child or spousal support, it is helpful to have pay stubs, W-2's, 1099's, or K-1's other documentation of income. When discussing finances, it is often helpful to have two or three years of tax returns available for reference. It will be necessary to present tax returns and income verification to the judge along with the legal document in order to have a Decree of Divorce entered. Do I need to have a lawyer?It is not necessary to have an attorney in the divorce process, and many clients use mediation without attorneys. However, it is highly suggested that divorcing spouses both consult with attorneys so that they have legal information and are making informed decisions. The mediator cannot act as an attorney for the participants in mediation and will not prepare or file the legal documents to be filed with the court. Although it is not necessary, it is highly recommended that the spouses have an attorney prepare the legal documents necessary to obtain the divorce, including but not limited to the Decree of Divorce and any Qualified Domestic Relations Orders necessary to divide and transfer retirement assets. Can I bring my lawyer to the mediation session?When clients have retained attorneys, it is often helpful to have the attorneys present in the mediation session to provide support and immediate feedback to the participants. However, because of the cost, many people elect to meet witout their attorneys. As with other parties present, the presence of attorneys must be agreeable to both spouses. How long will the process take?The length and pace of the process is totally dependent upon the needs of the participants. The process can range from one one-hour session to four or five two-hour sessions. It is not uncommon for spouses to be able to resolve all the issues in a divorce in four to eight hours. The number of sessions and the time between sessions is totally flexible and is entirely based upon the needs of the participants and the scheduling available to the participants and the mediator. Who can participate in the mediation session?Anyone is allowed to participate in the mediation session, so long as the participation is agreed upon by both parties. To maximize the confidentiality of the process, however, most couples choose to meet with the mediator by themselves or to include only their attorneys. It is sometimes helpful to include older children in the mediation process, but their involvement is contingent upon the agreement of both parents. Is mediation binding?Because the outcome of mediation is totally dependent upon the agreement of both spouses, nothing is binding until both spouses desire it to be binding. Agreements reached in mediation, once they are set out in a written, legal Stipulation and included in a Decree of Divorce, signed by a judge, are just as binding as any other Order of the Court. What is the Divorce Education Class?The Divorce Education Class is required of all divorcing parents who have children under the age of 18. Information about the class, including the cost, the schedule and location of classes, and alternatives should you not be able to attend the class is available on the Utah State Courts' website at utcourts.gov. How much does mediation cost?The cost of mediation is determined on an hourly basis and the fee is determined by the nature and complexity of the case and the number of parties involved. Although many couples are able to resolve their differences in one meeting of two to four hours, a typical divorce will take three to five mediation sessions of two to three hours each. It is common for mediation fees to be less than $1,500.00. When clients have settled in mediation, many attorneys will then prepare the legal documents at a substantially reduced rate, thus minimizing the amount of an attorney retainer. To obtain a quote for services, or a list of attorneys, please contact us by phone or via the link provided. | |
Alternatives in the Resolution of Disputes |